Discussing our Failures

In graduate school, all of the first and second year conducting students had to sing in the opera that the third year students were conducting. I was given a short solo that I had to sing toward the end. This solo was a capella and was followed by the orchestra coming in on the new key. I was supposed to find my pitch from a cluster chord in the orchestra and then hold on to that pitch after two more pages of dialogue. In the dress rehearsal, I nailed it. In the performance, I was a whole step off. I was mortified. 

My students love hearing this story.

One of the most important tasks we have at the beginning of the year is building a community within the classroom. Many teachers spend time thinking about new ice-breakers they haven’t tried yet or finding new repertoire that will engage their singers from the first day. But over the past two years I have found something even more powerful. I’ve started with a group discussion about the giant elephant that is often sitting in our choir rooms: the fact that singing in front of new people can be terrifying. After all, singing is one of the most vulnerable tasks that we ask students to do, especially for teenagers.

I teach in a district, like many people, that combines students from different middle schools into one regional high school. Some of their choir experiences were positive, and others were not. So on the first day after I finish classroom expectations and syllabus review, I ask students to discuss amongst themselves the following open-ended questions:

  1. What inhibits us from singing confidently?
  2. Has there ever been a time when you felt ashamed or embarrassed singing in front of other people?
  3. What is a joyful singing experience that you would like to share?
  4. What do we think “good singing” means?
  5. How do we gain confidence in singing?

After students have discussed with each other and shared their joyful and not-so-joyful stories, I invite students to share with the whole group. Even after a few years of doing this exercise, it always amazes me how many new students drop their tense shoulders and release their nervous energy. They watch their peers share their own trials and tribulations with various performances. It is especially powerful when student leaders share their nervous moments to show that they were not born invincible. We all make mistakes, and we all have stories that make us cringe now and again. After students have experienced this activity, I have a better opportunity to build everyone’s trust and understanding, because we’ve identified that big elephant that is sitting right in front of us.

Brene Brown, the famous researcher on vulnerability, says, “Nothing silences us more effectively than shame. Shame is the intensely painful feeling or experience of believing we are flawed and therefore unworth of acceptance and belonging. Shame derives its power from being unspeakable.”

We cannot control what negative singing experiences our students have encountered in the past, but by letting them share it in front of a room of people who probably (or definitely) had something similar happen to them, we give them the power back. We also give them a chance to find their voices this year. I invite you to try it with your group this fall and see if it makes a difference.